The children suffer from too many problems as a result of divorce that leads to the separation of the two parents and breaking the family down. Each one of the parents moves to live in another place or home and the children are the only ones to live an unstable life, to be in loss, to live in violence and to swing between the two parents who are always quarreling. The two parents use their children as weapons to fight and force each other to respond to specific demands and they begin to ask for custody of children. It will be hard and unbearable for the children to accept such a situation, to live with only one parent away from the other one, to live with only half a family or a broken one. You have to bear in mind that your children should be totally away from your problems and you should not mistreat each other in front of them in order not to affect their feelings towards both of you.
After divorce, parents resort to the court asking for having custody of their children to organize their children’s life. The custody is ordered by the court to one of the parents to determine his\her responsibilities and rights. Such a procedure deprives the other parent whether it is the father or the mother of his\her children and makes it more restricted for one of the parents to enjoy seeing the children at anytime and force him\her to spend a limited period of time with the children and it may also specify the place in which the parent and the children can meet. The parent who has the custody of children can prevent the other one from his\her right to see the children and spend some time with them. It increases the problems between the two parents and the children are the only ones to be harmed. All of these problems lead to resorting to courts.
What are the major types of custody?
There are two major types for custody:
1. The sole custody: It means that only one of the parents is given all the rights and responsibilities of the children without sharing them with the other parent. The parent who has the sole custody has the right to make all the decisions alone and to have the children live with him\her.
2. The joint custody: It means that the two parents share the rights and responsibilities of their children without being limited to only one. The parents may have the right of having their children live with them in their homes and it may be limited to only one parent. The two parents are obliged to share making decisions for children and to also share the children’s responsibilities.
To whom is the custody of children ordered?
Ordering custody by the court is based on several criteria. These criteria differ from one country to another according to its laws and religion, however there are general and basic criteria on which determining custody is based.
The court tries to ensure the best life for the children. It orders the custody of the children to the parent who can provide them with the needed care, safety, protection, a stable life and a good place to live in, who has a better and strong relation with the children, who is capable enough of deciding their future, who has the ability to be responsible for them and who can satisfy all of their needs and requirements whether they are medical, educational, physical, psychological or emotional. The parent who has the custody should not be violent, involved in any crime that can affect the future of children, should be healthy not only physically, but also mentally and the custody is ordered to the one who has more ability to communicate with the other parent and to discuss all of the children’s affairs wit him\her. The children’s age, gender and their desires are also taken into consideration when the court orders the custody to one of the parents.
Finally, it is not the children’s fault to bear the consequences of your decision and make them live such a miserable life. You have to think thousand times before making any decision not for you, but for your children whose only fault is that they are your children.