People choose couples therapy for various reasons. For example, some couples want to fix problems in their relationships. In contrast, others want to improve mutual understanding or make their relationships as passionate as they used to be a few years ago.
No matter what issue bothers a couple, talking to a licensed professional is always great. Nevertheless, trying couples counseling often feels like a big step, so many people hesitate before asking a professional for help. The reason is that such a decision requires a couple to admit that their relationship isn’t perfect.
Besides, many people know little about therapy and relationship counseling, so they don’t know what exactly they should expect from sessions. Finding the right specialist may also take a lot of time, and many people have problems squeezing therapy into their busy schedules.
The good news is that if you don’t have much time to commute to a therapist’s office, you can try online therapy. However, it has proven to be no less effective than traditional in-person sessions, and it offers a much more flexible approach. This article will consider relationship therapy in more detail and share some common signs that a couple may need.
Is Your Relationship Healthy?
Perhaps, the most common question people ask about relationship therapy is, “Is my relationship normal?” Let’s clarify something first: there’s no such thing as a “normal relationship.” We are all different, and so are our relationships.
Something that works perfectly fine for you may not be the right kind of relationship for someone else and vice versa. However, there are healthy and unhealthy relationships, and if your relationship falls into the second category, therapy is not an option but rather a necessity.
For instance, if you’re dealing with passive aggression or gaslighting in a relationship, these are red flags, and such a relationship is problematic. In some cases, relationship therapy can help find and fix the problem, and sometimes, the only proper solution is a breakup.
For example, a breakup often becomes the only solution when dealing with physical or emotional abuse and when a person gets stuck in a codependent relationship.
● If you are a victim of abuse, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline. If you’re in immediate danger, call 911.
Do Perfect Relationships Exist?
Social media and tons of content posted by “power couples” can easily make you think some people have perfect relationships. However, in reality, nothing is as good as it looks on social media. All couples have arguments occasionally, but they never share these moments with their followers.
Even those couples that generally don’t fight may not have perfect relationships because the lack of conflicts may indicate that partners distance themselves from each other or are not completely honest. It’s virtually impossible not to experience any disagreements when you live with someone.
H3: Conflicts are inevitable
When you have a romantic partner, this is a much closer type of relationship than if you just lived with a roommate, so there’s a lot of room for disagreements, and there’s nothing wrong with it. However, the way you handle conflicts as a couple is crucial.
Relationships take a lot of work, and if you want to reach harmony as a couple, you should always seek compromise. However, it’s also essential to establish clear, healthy boundaries because one cannot compromise on everything. Both partners should respect limits, and their presence is a sign of a healthy relationship.
How often you have arguments and how you resolve conflicts can tell a lot about your relationship, but it’s essential to keep in mind that all relationships are unique. On the one hand, frequent arguments can signify that you need help to deal with a relationship crisis. On the other hand, it might be an instead natural dynamic in an otherwise healthy but overly passionate relationship.
The best solution is to talk to a professional who is familiar with different types of relationships and can act as a mediator, helping you and your partner better understand each other and find common ground. In addition, there are different types of couples therapy, and a licensed specialist can develop a solution that will be appropriate in your particular situation.
7 Signs That You Should Talk to a Couple Therapist
1 You argue too often
No matter whether your arguments have been rare or relatively frequent, you may notice that, at some point, you and your partner started to argue much more often or that these arguments become increasingly more intense. Whether it be a minor misunderstanding or a heated drama, your relationship is probably moving in the wrong direction if such experiences become a regular part of your interactions.
2 You don’t trust each other
Lack of trust is one of the most common reasons couples decide to see a therapist. Emotional affairs, infidelity, or even financial issues can easily undermine confidence. For example, a therapist can help create the right environment for both parties to express their concerns and be vulnerable around each other without the fear of judgment.
3 The same problems happen over and over again
Sometimes, couples get stuck in unsatisfying patterns. For instance, one of the partners may avoid certain household chores or use the other partner as a listener whenever they’re frustrated, without returning the favor when their partner wants to share their worries. The earlier partners address the recurring problem, the better.
4 Some event changed your relationship
Relationships may also suffer from various unpredictable circumstances. For instance, partners often distance themselves from each other after a loss of a child, health crisis, loss of a job, infidelity, or conflicts with relatives. Couple counseling can help you hear each other and recognize the problem instead of ignoring it and letting it spiral out of control.
5 There’s a lack of emotional or physical intimacy
Many partners start to feel like the spark is gone after living together for a few years or even months, but if that has happened to you, that doesn’t mean that the relationship is doomed. Daily routine and poor prioritizing can easily overshadow even a deep emotional connection. Still, sometimes, all it takes is just a little bit of help to rediscover the relationship and bring it back to life.
Emotional intimacy is crucial, but physical intimacy is no less critical. For example, suppose partners have sex less often than they used to or feel less satisfied. In that case, this might signify some underlying relationship issues, and a therapist can help you figure them out.
6 You want to tell your partner something but don’t know how
It’s excellent when partners want to be honest, but sometimes, honesty can be too challenging. Some topics may seem too difficult, and you may not know how to tell your partner something important. In this case, a couple of therapists can help create a safe, supportive environment, ensuring that you understand each other.
7 H3: Something feels wrong but you don’t know what
There is one thing couples therapy and individual therapy have in common: therapy can help you solve problems and identify them. Relationships can be pretty complex, and you may not understand the problem despite feeling that something is wrong. In this case, couples therapy is a great solution.
All relationships are unique, and perfect relationships don’t exist. When you’re in a romantic relationship, there is room for misunderstandings, fear, suspicion, and other problems that may impact your communication and emotional connection.
Couples therapy requires you to acknowledge that your relationship isn’t perfect, but you should consider that all couples have problems. Therapy can help you identify these problems and find appropriate solutions.
Thanks to online therapy platforms like Calmerry, you don’t even need to commute to a therapist’s office. You can benefit from remote relationship therapy and talk to licensed professionals from home. Learn more about the benefits of therapy if you still hesitate.